Mama needs a new dress

Please correct me if I’m wrong, but is today October 17th? As in the 17th of October? Because I just got an invitation to a holiday party in the mail and a verbal invite this weekend for Christmas cocktails. Last time I checked, it wasn’t even Halloween yet. Am I seriously behind or are my beloved friends psychotically organized?

People, it’s starting. Holiday season. This can only mean two things:

1. Mama needs a new dress. I cannot wear what my mother lovingly refers to as "The Garment" to another party without friends and family threatening to stage an intervention. I find shopping for clothing deeply boring/panic-inducing/depressing/expensive, but if a fairy godmother were to magically present any of these little numbers from Lorick's Spring 2009 collection as an extra special gift, Mama would be happy to wear them (in her hyperactive fantasy world).







2. Mama needs to get her jaw wired shut. What happened last year with all the champagne and brownies and pecan pie and baklava was not good. Not. Good. At. ALL.